Salad Fingers: Wedding
by HitchcockPython
Summary: When Salad Fingers meets a bridal shop mannequin, he mistakes it for an old friend and proposes. Will this relationship last? Let's find out.
1. Proposal

**Salad Fingers: Wedding**

**Chapter 1 : Proposal**

One afternoon, Salad Fingers was all ready to go shopping. "Hello." he said. "Today, I am going shopping for groceries." He walked until he came to a bridal shop. "I see they've done some remodeling." Salad Fingers commented and went inside. "Can you direct me to the parsnips?" he asked the hideous bridal mannequin. Salad Fingers took a closer look at the unresponsive female with a pair of spectacles. "Wait a minute, I've seen you before. You're Madeline Cornwallis. My goodness, has it been this long?" The strange green man then spared no expense and gave the mannequin a big hug. "What's wrong Madeline? You seem a bit down in the dumps." Madeline did what all mannequins do and stared blankly at Salad Fingers. "My poor Madeline," Salad Fingers said sobbing "Abandoned by her fiancé on the day of her wedding. Don't worry miss, it's not all over yet." He then went fumbling through his pocket and pulled out small box. Salad Fingers then got on his knees and opened the box revealing a beautiful diamond ring. "I know it's been nearly twenty years, but, MADELINE CORNWALLIS, WILL YOU MARRY ME?" Madeline once again stared. "I knew you'd say yes." Salad Fingers then dipped his new "fiancée" and kissed her on the mouth.


	2. The Ceremony

**Salad Fingers: Wedding**

**Chapter 2: The Ceremony**

It took him a couple of days, but Salad Fingers managed to successfully pull off the wedding of the century. He had decorated the entire bridal shop with roses and cashmere streamers. He even dressed up all the mannequins and tracked down "Aunty Bainbridge" to administer the wedding. Hubert Cumberdale was the best man, Marjory Stewart-Baxter was the maid of honour, and Jeremy Fisher played the organ. At last they were ready.

"The Wedding March" began playing on Hubert Cumberdale's player piano. The whole wedding party was then roled up the aisle on what looked like primitive skateboards. Then Madeline Cornwallis arrived. She looked so beautiful having been refurbished by Mr. Salad Fingers, all her cracks had been mended and covered and her wedding dress and accessories had all been repaired. She was by far the fairest of all the mannequins. At last it was time to begin. Aunty Bainbridge didn't have much to say, but Salad Fingers translated every little blinking of his/her eyes. Finally he translated, "I now pronounce you man and wife" and lovingly kissed his bride.

Salad Fingers then picked up the beautiful Madeline and walked up the aisle full of pride. Everyone was then escorted in a rickety old 20's model car to the reception. The food at said reception didn't look too appetizing, but no one complained. "The chefs have outdone themselves my dear." He said to Madeline. Then Salad Fingers made an announcement. "Everyone! I would like to propose a toast, to my beautiful new wife, who lights up my life." Madeline stared into space, but if she wasn't inanimate, she would have smiled and blushed.

Soundtrack for this chapter: "Love is Everything" by George Bloom and produced by Mark Taylor. Listen here: ( .com/watch?v=AwYqOyN4az8)


	3. The Honeymoon: Part 1

Salad Fingers: Wedding

Chapter 3: The Honeymoon: Part 1

As soon as the ceremony was over, Salad Fingers and Madeline Cornwallis-Fingers hopped into the 20's model car and made their way to the honeymoon suite. The puppets and mannequins all watched as the 1929 Ford with the "Just Married" sign and the tin cans attached went "Chitty-chitty bang bang" all the way down the road.

After much driving, Salad and Madeline finally arrived at what appeared to be an abandoned brothel. "We're here." Salad Fingers told Madeline in a Poltergeist manner of speaking. He then scooped up his bride and they made their way to the brothel. "We couldn't have booked a better travel agent." Salad said. Still carrying Madeline, Salad Fingers searched until he found what appeared to bedrooms (they certainly contained enough pillows). "Disgusting" Salad Fingers said looking at the disheveled mess "They didn't even make the beds. Well, no matter, we can still have a grand time."

No sooner had he said that when he began to strip himself of his shirt, his shoes, and finally his trousers. Madeline stared blankly. "Do you need help undressing?" Salad asked her. Madeline continued to stare at her nearly naked spouse. "Poor Madeline, you must be worn-out from the ceremony. Here, let me help you with that." And he began to untie her dress sash.

Within five minutes Madeline was now as naked as a newborn babe, and if it weren't for the stray blanket that Salad Fingers found within that wreck of a room covering her mannequin unmentionables, she would be quite inappropriate. "Are you ready, darling?" Salad Fingers asked her. Madeline of course didn't say a thing. "You're a bit quiet this evening, are you not feeling well?" Madeline once again remained silent. A worried look crossed Salad Fingers' face. What was wrong with his new bride? Had something in the food made her ill? Was there something she was not telling him? What? Salad Fingers then put his hand on her forehead. "You're not running a temperature." He said. "Is something bothering you my pet?" Only silence from the new bride. "You can tell me. You can tell me anything. I won't mind." In his mind's ear, Madeline seemed to say that she was nervous about having intercourse with her new husband, especially since her heart had already been broken once before. "My dear Madeline, we don't have to do this if you're not ready."He said lovingly stroking her hair. "Tonight will be perfect without intercourse. What truly matters is that you're happy my darling." Salad Fingers then looked at his wife got out a handkerchief and put it under the mannequin's eye. "No tears tonight dear." He then withdrew the handkerchief. "Now, what would make my Madeline happy on this blessed night?" The mannequin stared into his face (as all mannequins do). Salad Fingers then pulled Madeline close and held her in an embrace. "I love you so much." He whispered. Looking at the mannequin, she seemed comforted by these words as Salad Fingers gently stroked her wooden side.

Mood Music

watch?v=LmvRZ-9uwDs&feature=relmfu


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